GIANT HANDS AND FLAMING LIPS

God I love it when you're listening to your ipod on shuffle, walking around and the music just fits perfectly. Life with a soundtrack kicks ass. I've had music crescendoing as I burst out of a door and into the sunshine, ominous music coming on as I go into a gloomy basement and Sigur Ros swelling as I come round a corner and am met by scorched yellow leaves and intense blue sky and GORGEOUS AUTUMN on campus :D

It's been sunny and warm actually in Calgary for the first time since we got here! GOD IT'S NICE. Though yesterday there was a totally sudden and very insane wind that struck in the afternoon, stripped the trees of most of their leaves and then just subsided. The video I got of it's only the very end and seems a bit pathetic, but imagine a cow/moose flying past my window as well, then you'll get a true sense of it...

So what has passed since our weekend trip of exhibitionism? (oh did I not mention I forgot my pyjamas and slept in a dorm with 14 other people? No? Extra adventure...) Well the biggy was going with Tyler [well established gig-buddy now. 2 in 2 weeks makes it official] to see THE FLAMING LIIIIIIIIIPSSSSSSSSSSS

oh god they were exquisite. I've been told many times (by people at the festivals I've been at but missed them at) that their live shows are immense, and my hopes were raised walking back from my cancelled class in the morning of the gig I had to wait to let 2 HUGE GIANT RED LORRIES roll past full of lighting and staging equipment... The fact that Wayne Coyne (the grizzled, silvering and sexily brilliant frontman) started things off by getting in his hamster ball and zorbing over the audience, meant that they set a pretty high bar early on! Luckily confetti cannons, huge amounts of smoke (enough to camouflage various people sparking up indoors, sign of a good gig) and brilliant lights stepped up to the challenge. As did Wayne Coyne getting on the shoulders of a man in a bear costume (initially I was confused due to dry ice/smoke and perspective and thought he was wearing BRILLIANT BEAR TROUSERS. obviously I wasn't exactly disappointed when I realised [aahh song reference] the truth.)

lots of balloons helped things,

which he demanded we pop when a few songs later he was bored of these and decided it was time for

GIANT HANDS

WITH LASERS. AND DISCO BALLS. -->

So yes. things were pretty spectacular. This was the ending of the spectacular evening. (this song has just come onto my itunes as I write this. YES YES YES)

You may now feel I've saved you $60 and you don't need to go and see them yourselves. you're wrong. GO. NOW.

Other than this stonking evening my week was slightly more reserved, went to a couple of auditions last minute on friday (resolved not to go, then changed my mind and ran there 20 minutes late. HOW DRAMATIC.) but I feel my British accent may have scared them slightly. If I don't get cast that is of course why. That and the dreads. And the tongue piercing. hmm... It was for grad students directing scenes for their exams. Then I went to a free improvisation workshop. It was in 3 parts (on fri night and saturday throughout the day), each given by a different professional. It was really awesome, had a so much fun and it has made me want to do MORE DRAMA. Got asked to potter along to the improv club so going to that tomorrow which should be fun!

Saturday kicked off in such an excellent way, sure we were in at 9 which was brutal, but after my getting-a-sweat-on-from-walking-very-briskly-because-I'm-late journey there they hadn't even started. These are my kind of people.

The tall fella who came and sat next to me and hadn't been at the previous workshop was nice enough, then when he sat back into the light coming through the window I realised HE HAD INCREDIBLY SPARKLY HAIR. So I did the only polite and reserved thing I could do and turned to him and cried "YOUR HAIR IS INCREDIBLE AND SPARKLY!? WHY!!!?". He very sincerely explained, with no hint of irony or hilarity, that he'd found it in his room and realised he hadn't used it in a while. So put some on. For our 9am saturday morning workshop. Standing next to him in the mandatory GetIntoACircle-Drama-Circle the air in front me was glittering. It was like the acid trip in On The Quarry.

On Saturday night a load of us international students [I take back anything I ever thought about Riti. It's very easy to end up hanging out with Your Own Kind.] went out downtown, which made for a really nice change. We hit up a very high class shisha bar then a very grindy and bad-musicky sweaty club. It was really fun, and ended in a few of us standing out the front of our halls and some drunk idiots throwing various drinks out of a window at us. The next day our friends were telling us how much fun they had when they were hiding in their room with the lights off throwing drinks out of the window at some drunk idiots outside...

I spent a huge amount of yesterday in my pyjamas which was spectacular (I was making up for last weekend) and when I eventually showered, it was to go downtown on a hot date with Linda to an arthouse cinema. We were the only people in the entire cinema and they only put the film on because we arrived. Private cinemas = awesome. you can talk at full volume and totally make out.

Last week was a very good week and it flew by. In fact this saturday I will have been in Canada for a month. Which is ri-goddam-diculous. 1/8th of the way through?!

On my way to class this morning I went past a shameless and disgusting Pro-Life abortion-protest exhibition that drew ridiculous parallels between abortion and genocide using shocking photographs of no relevance. It was appalling and made me incredibly angry and I may go and protest against them. If you're going to make points try to do it in a valid way, not a sensationalist and shocking bullshit exclamation. Perhaps I'll just kindly point them in the direction of Bill Hicks and his eternal wisdom.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJcebIEOkhY

Or perhaps I'll just poo on their demonstration.

But it's sunny now so let us leave them to their own sanctimonious bullshit posing.

A HUGE AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO LOUISE AND ANDINA [in chronological order] - I hope they were both spectacular!

I must now go and buy some groceries (that's right. I said groceries. Deal with it.) so I have more to eat than just rubbery Edam...

Roooooad Triiiiip

So this weekend a few (and by a few I of course mean 14) of us rented 3 cars and drove to Banff on Friday, about an hour and half away, West into the MOUNTAINS, and then way up to Jasper on Saturday. We left our halls at about half 5 on Friday afternoon and had the sun going down as we drove out of the city and into the Rocky Mountains. It was pretty amazing... We also managed to go during the single week of Autumn Calgary seems to get - BUMF IT IS WINTER - and got some intensely beautiful colours. There are of course many pictures. Look, there's one:

We eventually managed to find the hostel in Banff, Hostelling International FTW - I may have to work in one when I finish studying here. or just for the rest of my life... We got there pretty late and after the least successful cooking of a pizza ever [first the oven was in fact off. then that problem got solved after 10 minutes of 'cooking' and it got set to 200 degrees. Farenheit. So after almost an hour it was beginning to get warm. Then we realised, overcompensated and burnt it. Spectacular work ladies.] there was only thing to do. NINETIES KARAOKE. Now I personally wouldn't class "Where Is The Love" or "Summer of '69" as 90's, but I guess they were just abiding by the national law that BRYAN ADAMS MUST BE PLAYED EVERY HOUR ON THE HOUR. Dunno what the fuck the Black Eyed Peas thought they were doing... Various intoxicants made this into quite an exciting evening, don't worry I didn't get up and sing. I just sat on the windowsill where I was and sang. Loudly. And brilliantly. With gestures. Especially for 'I Like Big Butts' - Linda was sitting next to me and laughingly said "this is a stupid choice of song, no one knows any of the words after the first ver-" then turned around to see me NAILING THE ENTIRE RAP. Good times.

Got up at a pleasant 7am (at times it felt like a bit of a school trip [in germany in 1942]) and it was soooo fucking cold - there was such poor visibility, with low thick cloud surrounding us. The first part of the road, to Lake Louise - was terrible/just white. BUT the lake itself looked really ethereal and misty. It was overcast but really incredible. It didn't come out that well.

As the drive went on, with 200km ahead of us, the weather continued. So we decided to just head to the glacier which was halfway, as it would have been pointless going to viewpoints. Then suddenly, having been immersed in white for about 40 minutes since the lake Vicky suddenly cried "blue sky!"at a tiny patch peeking through. Then- we could suddenly see the mountains! And the sky was coming out and all of a sudden it was clear and we were greeted by this:

which was quite nice.

The rest of the road was absolutely amazing and the weather was incredible. We stopped at various glaciers and waterfalls and viewpoints. I think the most brilliant were: Peyto Lake, which reflects glaciel sediment or something fantastic which makes it look like THIS:

... And then the most mind boggling and insane was the Athabasca Glacier on the edge of the Columbian Icefield, which is 125 sq mi and 350 m deep. which is as thick as the Eiffel Tower. It also feeds into THREE oceans. It is not near the coast.

and it's receded this ridiculous distance, all the way across a big flat expanse, the highway and a fat carpark. Since 1844 I managed to drop my hat while we were there. 2 down one to go... We stopped at 2 beautiful waterfalls, the 2nd of which was in a page of 25 amazing nature photographs Luke randomly sent me the day I got back and was telling him about it. COINCIDENTAL? I think not... clearly MAGIC AFOOT. I wish I'd taken it and that it looked quite this good. It did also sound fantastic:

We headed to our cabin by about 6pm. The road it's on is right up into the mountains, for about 40minutes of winding off the Freeway. We knew it was in the middle of nowhere but this was insane! We ended up practically at the foot of the 2nd tallest peak in the province at a full-on cabin in the woods with no real electricity, no running water and a very real risk of bears.

Following rules at a hostel like that doesn't piss me off cos they make SENSE - Don't leave food in your room, cos a bear might break in. LOGICAL.

We consumed [inhuman amounts of] pasta and beer and campfire, and a small child playing on his Gameboy DS with my friend Beaver having an in depth conversation with him. 'Lonely Nick', the guy that ran the hostel (it was a Hostelling International hostel! so brilliant) explained to us that bears don't like the smell of people, unlike him. Bit of a legend, I liked him. He was also good enough to come running when our fire alarm started going off in while we were all outside huddled round the campfire, because Alex and Beaver made the fire in our hearth in the cabin, but had then left the newspaper on top of it - which of course burst in to flames. There was a bit of a drama, where every testicled person expect the single asleep under 10yr old, fast-man-walked to the cabin to stood heroically and watched the paper burn out from a safe distance. Brilliant.

I also had the most paranoid and terrified journey to the loo/outhouse/longdrop across the car park (past the kitchen where all the food was locked) in the middle of the night, utterly convinced I was being watched by a bear...

We woke up in the morning and it was snowing. It was the 19th of September. THIS COUNTRY IS RIDICULOUS. Nick invited us all back there in the spring saying we should go when they open it but it's just for the people who can reach it, by cross country skiing. It's amazing. AMAZING. The other thing that is amazing is the sheer delicious extravagance of Canadian breakfast. We all went for a spectacular one (I had Eggs Benedict thanks) down towards Jasper before heading back south. We drove to Banff (4 hours or so) stopping only at the glacier half way so I could FIND MY HAT. oh yes. THAT'S RIGHT. Got that brown bad boy back!

Then from a toilet and Safeways stop (of some tension, though I personally was feeling more relaxed than I had done while desperate for a wee for the previous 2 hours) we got back to Cascade! Epic haaaaaul!

In other news I've had to drop my Geography module [due to some silly contract I signed promising to do at least %60 relevant courses] and lose $90 because I got all keen and installed the authorization code for my online textbook, which instantly makes it NONREFUNDABLE before finding out I shouldn't be doing it. But I am now doing a module in DETECTIVE FICTION. So I gots to read Hound of the Baskervilles. HELLZ YEAH SHERLOCK. Awesome.

Got a winter coat today which is A WONDERFUL THING. Went shopping for 6 HOURS because I went with AUSTRALIAN BOYS and they are massive retail WOMEN. To be fair it was snow gear shopping including snow boards. But wow. My legs ache so very much, and we ended up trying to get an all you can eat buffet in a Casino. Desperation and possibly insanity had begun to set it.

And I just watched Cool Runnings with my mate Tyler. I am so very very happy.

Big shout out to the studious Louise Dickinson for catching up on my blog, raise a glass of champers for me would you darling? Thanks everyone who's been reading this and saying lovely things :)

LOVE YOU ALL MUCHLY, have fun all of you who are wiggling your ways back to Leeds - HAVE A FAT ONE FOR ME PLEASE.

Feel da rhythm, feel da rhyme...

Penny-unwise

Sooo - went to see the one, the only, Pennywise last night. Tyler finished class at about half 8 (pm. crazy canadians) and we met shortly after to trek the half hour or so to the other side of campus to the Ctrain station [it's an LRT, like the tube overground, and more confusing and less regular], where we waited for some tiiime. Eventually we got downtown and made it to Flames Central at about 10 - which was the venue, it's where the city's Hockey team play - got to the door and realised I'd forgotten my mother-fudging ID. NICE ONE BRUVAAA! so I bid Tyler adieu and legged it back to the Ctrain, ran up the entire main drag in downtown cos it is the MOST CONFUSING THING EVER (it's really not, but I was hot and sweaty from doing my annual amount of exercise in 5 minutes and the thought, "you spent $36 to miss Pennywise you moron" was going round and round in my head muddling things up.) Jumped on the first train, then started asking a guy on the platform if I was on the right one. Got a little bit stuck in the doors, classy as ever, then jumped off. The 'helpful' man/utter cretin told me I had to go on foot to the next station, so I ran 3 blocks before realising the tracks which definitely went to the university were equally definitely turning off the main road before 'the next station'. So I whimpered and swore and sweated some more and then turned around and JAYWALKED SO MUCH MWAHAHAHA running back. Some nice and genuinely helpful girl gave me real instructions and I eventually wheezed my way back to the orginal station I left from. Where my good friend and advisor was still standing. It turned out he was waiting for the same train I was, just to a different stop. I stripped off various layers and sat and seethed and panted giving him intense death stares, urging my Matilda skills to tip him in front of the eventually arriving train. They failed. While sprinting around I'd called a taxi company and got told from Downtown to Uni would be $35. Hows about no. So when I was on the train I desperately called around for a cheaper one, eventually getting a quote from a nice Indian chap for $16 or so, who I wasn't completely sure understood what I was saying. As I sprinted across campus feeling like my chest may explode I rang him again to book a taxi back, only to be told my cab was waiting at the library. Turned out my accidental booking actually saved me lots of time and despite numerous calls as I ran he only got to my halls as I emerged - having scared the crap out of my roommate, bursting in, bawling something about ID and running out.

On finding out I was British ("you're from Australia yes?") the, also nice and Indian, cab driver asked me if I knew the Edgware Road, did I know the McDonald's. Oh yeah. THE McDonald's. Apparently his nephew [insert name I didn't catch and probably can't pronounce let alone spell] is the Manager. I'll be sure to say hi...

I'd asked him to put the back window down so I could stick my head out of the window like a dog and cool down, which did make our friendly conversation slightly problematic so eventually I sat down properly, and then the doors locked. And the window went up. And he asked how old I was, and turned the light on and turned around. While driving. Oh good, another excellent element to my adventure. But then the window went down. And then up. And then down. And the doors locked. and unlocked. So apparently he just didn't quite understand the controls in his car. Or was showing off. And it turned out he'd turned the light on so he could start writing something in his notebook. While driving. Of course. So yes, it turned out I hadn't really needed to start calculating how hard I could kick him in the face in my awesome new boots if I needed to. I could've taken him. ANYWAY - the hero got me to the stadium I tipped him cos I made it and also I didn't have TIME to wait for change, so looked like a big spender chucking a 20 at him. PLAYAAAAA.

Pennywise were fucking epic - shame I missed The Riverboat Gamblers, but it was worth everything to see Pennywise.

Emily Crick this song is for you http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbTeOWeaYXk One of the happiest moments ever when they played it. The crowd was loose enough to get to the front, happy enough to mosh in and get headbutted in the face by a headbanging dreadlocked man AND LOVE EVERY SECOND, and kind enough to pick people up when they went down. Which thanks to the massive glass window/emblem thing in the centre of the polished floor, which was beery (from the inevitable spilt drinks that come from close proximity of drinks to pit) and as slippery as an icerink covered in banana skins. I have never seen so many people on their arse at a gig, and of course if one person goes down 3 people fall over them. It was hilarious, people trying to rock out and just sliding over every 2 seconds. All on this specific circle of floor. Made the gig even better.

Got back about 1, fried an egg, healed my bruises with South Park [oh, it's on] and then hit the hay ready for my 9:30 Anthropology class. On the way back from which, I genuinely overheard this exchange

"Hey man!"

"Hey!"

"Where you goin?"

"Class - I'm late, so I'll holla atchy'all later!"

Deadly serious. Deadly Canadian.

LOVE IT. It's Thursden tonight, big night in the singular bar on campus The Den. I'm excited for the infamous No Pants Dance, where they play Journey's epic classic Don't Stop Believing and everyone drops trou and dances. This better be real and not some trick that's being played on me. Because I am doing it.

Peace out wolfpack...x

Money/Moh-nooo!

And here was me thinking Canada would be cheap[ish]. And it is, but apparently only for boots. I have managed to spent over $300 just on required textbooks.

and sure they're pretty - but what isn't these days?

I'll tell you what.

The sight of there only being 2 squares left of my NORMAL SIZED REAL

Dairy Milk Chocolate bar - which I bought from the Best of Britain shop, it cost me $2.50. It may be the most delicious thing I've ever tasted. They sell Dairy Milk here but it's some kind of abominable imposter which doesn't deserve it's rich purple sheath. I have also spent stupid amounts of money on clothes etc but it is INCREDIBLY COLD [/will be] and the [utterly awesome] boots I got are VERY NECESSARY.

So I've had a lecture is every subject now, they're all really interesting, my English teacher's fantastic - much smaller class than the other 2 which are in a fat lecture theatre! Got so much reading to get done though... which is why I came back and slept after class today and am about to go to see Pennywise with my new Aussie frund Tyler. In his words, this is going to kick off: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Me4GR2cze_U&feature=related

I also have bought some lavly posters and made my room more mine, including a spectacular one from the Alice in Wonderland illustrations with Feed Your Head in smoke above the Caterpillar sitting on a mushroom talking to Alice. The image is actually in this psychadelically fantesticle youtube video for the Jefferson Airplane song

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oRKvpZ7PjE

loves it

just spent a couple of hours with my flatmates and Linda and some other international students organising a trip to the mountains this weekend, we're going to Jasper national park which is five hours or so away [renting cars] and stopping for a night in Banff on the way. Apparently the weather will be shunny. HOPE SO. expect pictures, shocking I know...

ok

I gotta go get my punk on - but things [except the constant grey rainy weather] are goood here! All I need now is a sneaky Metropolis night and I'll be set. :D BIG LOVE EH.x

P.S.

I'm a little special and managed to turn the first 2 paragraphs into links, if you can't see them just move mouse over them, they'll show up

*slow clap me*

Kiss my egg...

Yeeeah it's happened, I've gone the way of Lauren Thacker (I tip my hat to you) - rather than just telling the same hilarious stories many times I figured I'd just monologue and those who are interested can dip in and out! This one'll be extra long cos I've got some catching up to do! Soooo I'm on my year abroad in Calgary in Alberta, Canada - many of you may [only] know it as the site of the one, the only COOL RUNNINGS. That's right. I've been on that ice rink. In fact, here it is.

aaaaaaaand there's also of course the bobsled run, which we drove past on the first weekend we arrived here (Linda and I) when Janice took us up to the amazing house on the lake in Invermere! The tall thing's a ski jump from the Olympics, aaand the bobsled's on the right. Oh yes.[you may have noticed i've done something ridiculous and turned this all into a link. just ignore that...] Now, I should probably explain the majority of that last sentence - Linda is my friend who's also from Leeds Uni and helped me sort my life out, making sure I went to the right airport for example... and get me here in one piece.

My parents used to live in Canadia (hence why I have my own deeply exciting CANADIAN PASSPORT. Oh yes, makes life so very much easier) and my dad's housemate Craig's brother Don (that's right, pay attention) lives here in Calgary, so my father got in touch and basically sorted me completely - Janice (Don's wife) is a complete superstar legend who put Linda and me up for the first few days and took us to their sweet condo in Invermere - on lake Windermere I might add - for the weekend. It was goddam amazing and beautiful and we got the only sun we've had since we got to 'one of the driest places in Canada'. Really? REALLY? My. Arse. It has rained since we got here! But on Thursday it will SNOW apparently! Wooooo :D

This is the view from the roof in Invermere

and this is the giant Inukshuk, Inuit figures that were used to guide people through the wilderness. I have one in my room. It's a bit smaller. And awesome.

Then on the Monday Janice got us moved into our halls which are sweeeet - my flatmates, Marine [French girl] and Anna [Spanish girl] are awesome, and there's an empty room so I get my own bathroom. Boo ya. We explored the city and found a genuine Cowboy shop. These people were serious. We were not.-->

Since getting here I've been to Orientation, and a pep rally (which I'm glad I went to but it was sort of like the 2 minutes of hate from 1984. but peppier. and possibly worse - we met up really far too earlier and far too hungover for so much enthusiasm - then we got taught a chant (this was for faculties, not like a sports team or something

which makes sense) and ours was a play on YMCA, yes, with a dance, then there was lots of shouting of ARTS ARTS ARTS (which doesn't work in an English accent cos we're not all about the RRRs. This was for an hour. an entire hour, against all the other faculties, with all the orientation leaders running around with flags like they'd had too much sugar, all of us wearing matching t shirts and chanting and clapping and shouting and stamping and getting all riled up, then we had to sit there for the 2 hour formal induction ceremony. Forgive me for not really understanding the logic behind this.

The rest of the week has been a good mix of talks, sorting out phone and bank etc so I feel like a real person here, drinking until I don't and meeting some sweet peoples! There was an International students trip to the ice rink (did I mention it's on campus? yeah.) and getting lost in the tunnels that connect most of the buildings so people can live like moles and not see the sun for the 8 months of winter we're about to descend into.

I need to buy some waterproof clothes.

We also had the Rez Rodeo on Sunday - Rez = Halls for all you British people - which was a ridiculous fancy dressed up fete/sportsday thing where you compete against the other residences. I'm not boasting, but I was fucking phenomenal at tricycling, I have the bruised knees to prove it.

And we were just awesome at tug of war. obvz. check the guns. Cascade (my halls. the best halls won. HELLS YEAH.) Started class today.

Forgot that's why I'm here. So, it begins...